Date: Tue, 10 Aug 1999 01:20:01 -0400
Subject: Re: The Witch Is Real
Newsgroups: alt.fan.blair-witch,alt.religion.kibology
Status: R

Kibo writes:

In alt.fan.blair-witch, "Penny Dreadful" (penny@dreadful.com) wrote:
>
> James "Kibo" Parry (kibo@world.std.com) wrote:
> >
> > ALSO GOD BLESS BATMAN AND DR. STRANGELOVE
> 
> A lovely couple.

The first time I read that, my brain saw "A lonely couple," and now
I'm left wondering what sort of sitcom it would be if Adam West moved
in with Dr. Edward Teller.

    DR. STRANGELOVE
    Batman, tonight I made your favorite, crepes suzette, in my
    new atomic-blast-powered oven.

    BATMAN
    Yes, Dr. Strangelove, the hydrogen bomb can be a powerful tool
    for peace, but we must remember to never use it indiscriminately.

    (THE DOORBELL RINGS.  ROBIN BOUNDS ACROSS THE ROOM AND OPENS THE DOOR.)

    ROBIN
    Holy ex-husbands, it's Robert Oppenheimer!

    ROBERT OPPENHEIMER
    And look, I brought a chimp!

    (SCRATCHY STOCK FOOTAGE OF A CHIMP PUSHING BUTTONS.)

    DR. STRANGELOVE
    No!  Chimp, stop pushing my buttons!  You could destroy the world!

    BATMAN
    You should have thought of that before you installed the
    buttons without a chimp-safety-proofing lock.

    (THE WORLD EXPLODES, AS USUAL.)

    ROBIN
    Holy nuclear winter!

    BATMAN
    Quick, Robin, put on a scarf.

    DR. STRANGELOVE
    (with soot smeared on his face, except around the eyes)
    Well, it looks like it's back to the drawing board for me!

    (HE CROSSES TO A SMOLDERING BLACKBOARD AND CROSSES THE WORD
    "CHIMP" OUT OF AN EQUATION.  EVERYONE LAUGHS.  FREEZE-FRAME.)

                                                -- K.

                                                P.S.  This was a documentary.