Path: news.utk.edu!news!newsfeed.utk.edu!bloom-beacon.mit.edu!howland.erols.net!newshub2.home.com!newshub2.rdc1.sfba.home.com!news.home.com!pln-w!spln!dex!extra.newsguy.com!newsp.newsguy.com!drn From: Sean Smith Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: The joy of misdirected E-mail. Date: 10 Nov 2000 11:20:03 -0800 Organization: Newsguy News Service [http://newsguy.com] Lines: 65 Message-ID: <8uhhp30t1d@drn.newsguy.com> References: NNTP-Posting-Host: p-876.newsdawg.com Xref: news.utk.edu alt.religion.kibology:34613 In article , kibo@world.std.com says... > >Cool, I appear to have an army now. > >I was just sent an invoice for the Tanzanian People's Defence Force's >order of 58,032 cans of beer (being shipped from St. Louis.) I wasn't >even aware I was in charge of the Tanzanian army. I hope this beer >lasts them a while -- even at twenty-five cents a can this adds up fast. > > -- K. > > Also, my army apparently likes Guinness, > but only if it comes from St. Louis > and not Ireland. > *Then can we assume that at the next ARKPLE, you'll be wearing combat fatigues and fancy sunglasses, and accompanied by two muscular gentlemen sporting berets? *I can see the headlines now: "Net Legend Said to Mastermind Arms-for-Guinness Deal with Tanzania Senate vows to stop masturbating, begin investigation" *58 thousand and THIRTY-TWO cans of beer? Why such an odd (all right, even) number? Is the extra 32 a kickback or something to the transport crew? What happens if they up their demand to include three cans of peanuts and four bags of pretzels? *I think we need to come up with a good training regimen for Kibo's Army. It could include the following: 5 a.m.-Reveille: Recording of William Shatner's "Good Morning Starshine" 5:15 - Roll call: Everyone yells "True" or "False" instead of "Here, sir!" 5:30 - Calisthenics: Supervised by Lleahh, who swats the lithe buttocks of anyone who's goldbricking. 6 - Breakfast: Durian swirl and Happyland biscuits 6:30-11 - Classes, workshops and seminars: includes Twirling Boy Espionage Tactics; McIrvin Counter-Intelligence Humor; Identifying Subversive Orange Cones. 11:15 - Doidy Break 11:30 - Lunch: Deathcrabs and filet of Animal 57 I think the afternoon schedule would have to include training in the Saklad Library Infiltration Maneuver and Winston Total Destruction Strategem. *The army's first mission, though, should be to reenact the lost "Brigham Circle" episode. The one written by Lee Bumgartner and Eugene Ionesco. Sean ("With the ever-popular Mae Busch") Smith stsmith58@hotmail.com Because some things can't be helped--http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/6504; Featuring "Daze and Quirks" and The Dumb, Stupid Baseball Hat Page -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= "The pleasures of the little birds are all fled, And with the cold many of them will be found dead, Because the leaves of the trees are scattered in the blast, And makes the feathered creatures feel downcast." --William McGonagall (http://www.taynet.co.uk/users/mcgon) "An Autumn Reverie"