Date: Tue, 24 Jun 2003 04:32:21 -0400
Subject: Re: Further theological questions.
Status: R

In alt.religion.kibology, kibo@world.std.com wrote:

Matt McIrvin (mmcirvin@world.std.com) wrote:
>
>  Can God make a rock so big that it turns into a pony?

Yes, but the pony's all orange and quilted-looking like Ben Grimm
because it's a rock pony.

>  Can God make a rock so big that it is actually small?

Yes, but only for an hour, then it turns into a rock pony.
  
>  Can God make a rock so big that Handyman Negri turns upside down?

Yes, because He recently assumed Mr. Rogers into Heaven to help Him
do the voice.
  
>  Can God make a rock so big that it pays my credit-card bill?

Yes, if you are truly Fred Flintstone.
  
>  Can God make a rock so big that it makes him back?

Yes, but between Him and the rock, you only get the one of equal or
lesser value free.  So if they are the same price, you will need to
ask the Vatican to rule on which of the two is the equal one.
  
>  Can God make a rock so big that it makes the whole world rock out?

Yes, but only if you don't mind that it makes Him look like a film
of a grainy TV screen like at the end of "The Apple" while Vladek Sheybal
disco-dances in a glittery G-string and whore makeup.

>  Pls answer by Friday I need it for my bestselling inspirational
>  book Target wants to put on the shelves next weekend THANK YOU

Can God watch "Knight Rider"?  If not, then you should go do something he can't.

                                                     -- K.

                                                        And more to the
                                                        point, can God
                                                        enjoy "Knight Rider"?