Unglued exact-text spoiler list, By Dave Ashnod's Coupon Artifact 0 Rare Tap,Sacrifice ~: Target player gets you target drink. / Errata: You pay any costs for the drink. [In fine print: Limited time offer. Void where prohibited. Limit one per purchase. Valid only in participating duels. This coupon is nontransferable and invalid if shattered, crumbled, detonated, pillaged, or otherwise disenchanted. Cash value less than 1/20 of a cent. Offer not valid in Quebec, Rhode Island, or where prohibited by law or the DCI.] Blacker Lotus Artifact 0 Rare Tap: Tear ~ into pieces. Add four mana of any one color to your mana pool. Play this ability as a mana source. Remove the pieces from the game afterwards. Bronze Calendar Artifact 4 Uncommon Your spells cost 1 less to play as long as you speak in a voice other than your normal voice. / If you speak in your normal voice, sacrifice ~. Chaos Confetti Artifact 4 Common 4,Tap: Tear ~ into pieces. Throw the pieces onto the playing area from a distance of at least five feet. Destroy each card in play that a piece touches. Remove the pieces from the game afterwards. Clay Pigeon Artifact Creature 3 Uncommon 1/1 Flying 1,Throw ~ into the air at least two feet above your head while seated,Attempt to catch it with one hand: If you catch ~, prevent all damage to you from any one source and return ~ to play, tapped. Otherwise, sacrifice it. Giant Fan Artifact 4 Rare 2,Tap: Move target counter from one card to another. If the second card's rules text refers to any type of counters, the moved counter becomes one of those counters. Otherwise, it becomes a +1/+1 counter. Jack-in-the-Mox Artifact 0 Rare Tap: Roll a six-sided die for ~. On a 1, sacrifice ~ and lose 5 life. Otherwise, ~ has one of the following effects. Treat this ability as a mana source. 2 -- Add W to your mana pool. 3 -- Add U to your mana pool. 4 -- Add B to your mana pool. 5 -- Add R to your mana pool. 6 -- Add G to your mana pool. Jester's Sombrero Artifact 2 Rare 2,Tap,Sacrifice ~: Look through target player's sideboard and remove any three of those cards from it for the remainder of the match. Mirror Mirror Artifact tcafitrA 7 Rare ~ comes into play tapped. / 7,Tap,Sacrifice ~: At end of turn, exchange life totals with target player and exchange all cards in play that you control, and all cards in your hand, library, and graveyard, with that player until end of game. Paper Tiger Artifact Creature 4 Common 4/3 Rock Lobsters cannot attack or block. Rock Lobster Artifact Creature 4 Common 4/3 Scissors Lizards cannot attack or block. Scissors Lizard Artifact Creature 4 Common 4/3 Paper Tigers cannot attack or block. Spatula of the Ages Artifact 4 Uncommon 4,Tap,Sacrifice ~: Put into play from your hand any card from an _Unglued_ supplement. Urza's Contact Lenses Artifact 0 Uncommon ~ comes into play tapped and does not untap during its controller's untap phase. / All players play with their hands face up. / Clap your hands twice: Tap or untap ~. Urza's Science Fair Project Artifact Creature 6 Uncommon 4/4 2: Roll a six-sided die for ~. 1 -- it gets -2/-2 until end of turn. 2 -- It deals no combat damage this turn. 3 -- Attacking does not cause it to tap this turn. 4 -- It gains first strike until end of turn. 5 -- It gains flying until end of turn. 6 -- It gets +2/+2 until end of turn. B.F.M. (Big Furry Monster) Summon The Biggest, Baddest, Nastiest, Scariest Creature You'll Ever See BBBBBBBBBBBBBBB Rare 99/99 You must play both B.F.M. cards to put ~ into play. / If either B.F.M. card leaves play, sacrifice the other. / ~ can be blocked only by three or more creatures. [This card is two black Rare cards, half the picture and text on each.] Deadhead Summon Zombie 3B Common 3/3 Put ~ into play. Use this ability only if any opponent loses contact with his or her hand of cards and only if ~ is in your graveyard. Double Cross Sorcery 3BB Common Choose another player. Look at that player's hand and choose one of those cards other than a basic land. He or she discards that card. At the beginning of the next game with the player, look at the player's hand and choose one of those cards other than a basic land. He or she discards that card. Handcuffs Enchantment 3BB Uncommon Target player keeps both hands in contact with each other. If he or she does not, sacrifice ~ and that player sacrifices three cards in play. Infernal Spawn of Evil Summon Demon[crossed out in red crayon with "Beast" written in] 6BBB Rare 7/7 Flying, first strike 1B,Reveal ~ from your hand,Say "It's coming!": ~ deals 1 damage to target opponent. Use this ability only during your upkeep and only once each upkeep. Jumbo Imp Summon Imp 2B Uncommon 0/0 Flying When you play ~, roll a six-sided die. ~ comes into play with a number of +1/+1 counters on it equal to the die roll. / During your upkeep, roll a six-sided die and put on ~ a number of +1/+1 counters equal to the die roll. / At the end of your turn, roll a six-sided die and remove from ~ a number of +1/+1 counters equal to the die roll. Organ Harvest Sorcery B Common You and your teammates may sacrifice any number of creatures. For each creature sacrificed in this way, add BB to your mana pool. Ow Enchantment B Rare Whenever any creature damages a player, for each ~ card in play, that player says "Ow" once or ~ deals one damage to him or her. Poultrygeist Summon Chicken 2B Common 1/1 Flying Whenever a creature is put into any graveyard from play, you may roll a six-sided die. On a 1, sacrifice ~. Otherwise, put a +1/+1 counter on ~. Temp of the Damned Summon Zombie 2B Common 3/3 When you play ~, roll a six-sided die. ~ comes into play with a number of funk counters on it equal to the die roll. / During your upkeep, remove a funk counter from ~ or sacrifice ~. Volrath's Motion Sensor Enchant Player B Uncommon When ~ comes into play, choose target hand controlled by an opponent. Enchanted player balances ~ on the back of that hand. / If ~ falls off the hand, sacrifice ~ and that player loses 3 life. Bureaucracy Enchantment 3UU Rare Pursuant to subsection 3.1(4) of Richard's Rules of Order, during the upkeep of each participant in this game of the _Magic: the Gathering^R trading card game (hereafter known as "PLAYER") that PLAYER performs all actions in the sequence of previously added actions (hereafter known as "ACTION QUEUE"), in the order those actions were added, then adds another action to the end of the ACTION QUEUE. All actions must be simple physical or verbal actions that a PLAYER can perform while sitting in a chair, without jeopardizing the health and security of said PLAYER. / If any PLAYER does not perform all the prescribed actions in the correct order, sacrifice ~ and said PLAYER discards his or her complement of cards in hand (hereafter known as "HAND"). Censorship Enchantment U Uncommon When ~ comes into play, choose a XXXXXXX word. / Whenever any XXXXXXX player says the chosen XXXXXXX word, ~ deals 2 XXXXXXXXX damage to him or her. [The XXXXXXXXXs are black horizontal bars, which also cover the artist's name and are profusely sprinkled on the picture. Flavor text: "Editor's note: There were no suitable flavor text submissions for this card." The artist's name is blacked out.] Checks and Balances Enchantment 2U Uncommon Whenever any spell is played, counter that spell if each player, other than the caster and his or her teammates, agrees to choose and discard a card. Those players must discard those cards after agreeing. / ~ may be played only in a game with three or more players. Chicken \`a la King Summon Chicken 1UU Rare 2/2 Whenever a 6 is rolled on a six-sided die, put a +1/+1 counter on each Chicken in play. (You may roll dice only when a card instructs you to.) / Tap a Chicken you control: Roll a six-sided die. Clam Session Summon Clamfolk 1UU Common 2/5 When ~ comes into play, choose a word. / During your upkeep, sing at least six words of a song, one of which must be the chosen word, or sacrifice ~. You cannot repeat a song. Clambassadors Summon Clamfolk 3U Common 4/4 If ~ damages any player, choose an artifact, creature, or land you control. That player gains control of that artifact, creature, or land. Clam-I-Am Summon Clamfolk 2U Common 2/2 Whenever you roll a 3 on a six-sided die, you may reroll that die. Common Courtesy Enchantment 2UU Uncommon Counter any spell unless its caster asks your permission to play that spell. If you refuse permission, sacrifice ~ and counter the spell. [Flavor text: "You didn't say the _Magic_ word."] Denied! Interrupt U Common Play ~ only as any opponent casts target spell. Name a card, then look at all cards in that player's hand. If the named card is in the player's hand, counter target spell. Double Take Instant 3UU Common Choose another player. Draw two cards now and draw an additional two cards at the beginning of the next game with that player. Fowl Play Enchant Creature 2U Common Enchanted creature loses all abilities and is a 1/1 creature that counts as a Chicken. Free-for-All Enchantment 3U Rare When ~ comes into play, set aside all creatures in play, face down. / During each player's upkeep, that player chooses a creature card at random from those set aside in this way and puts that creature into play under his or her control. / If ~ leaves play, put each creature still set aside this way into its owner's graveyard. Psychic Network Enchantment U Rare Each player reveals the top card of his or her library to all other players by continuously holding it against his or her forehead. This does not allow a player to look at his or her own card. (That card still counts as the top card of your library. Whenever you draw a card, draw that one and replace it with the next card of your library.) Sorry Enchantment UU Uncommon Before playing any spell, if a copy of that spell card is in any graveyard, the spell's caster may say "Sorry". If he or she does not, any other player may counter the spell by saying "Sorry" as it is cast. / If any player says "Sorry" at any other time, ~ deals 2 damage to that player. Cardboard Carapace Enchant Creature 5G Rare For each other ~ card you have with you, enchanted creature gets +1/+1. / Errata: This does not count any ~ cards in play that you control or in your graveyard, hand, or library. Double Play Sorcery 3GG Common Choose another player. Search your library for a basic land and put that land into play. At the beginning of the next game with that player, search your library for an additional basic land card and put that land into play. In both cases, shuffle your library afterwards. Elvish Impersonators Summon Elves 3G Common */* When you play ~, roll two six-sided dice one after the other. ~ comes into play with power equal to the first die roll and toughness equal to the second. Flock of Rabid Sheep Sorcery XGG Uncommon Flip X coins; an opponent calls heads or tails. For each flip you win, put a Rabid Sheep token into play. Treat these tokens as 2/2 green creatures that count as Sheep. Free-Range Chicken Summon Chicken 3G Common 3/3 1G: Roll two six-sided dice. If both die rolls are the same, ~ gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the number rolled on each die. Otherwise, if the total rolled is equal to any other total you have rolled this turn for ~, sacrifice it. (For example, if you roll two 3s, ~ gets +3/+3. If you roll a total of 6 for ~ later in that turn, sacrifice it.) Gerrymandering Sorcery 2G Uncommon Remove all lands from play and shuffle them together. Randomly deal to each player one land card for each land he or she had before. Each player puts those lands into play under his or her control, untapped. Ghazb\'an Ogress Summon Ogre G Common 2/2 When ~ comes into play, the player who has won the most _Magic_ games that day gains control of it. If more than one player has won the same number of games, you retain control of ~. Growth Spurt Instant 1G Common Roll a six-sided die. Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is equal to the die roll. Gus Summon Gus 2G Common 2/2 ~ comes into play with one +1/+1 counter on it for each game you have lost to your opponent since you last won a _Magic_ game against him or her. Hungry Hungry Heifer Summon Cow 2G Uncommon 3/3 During your upkeep, remove a counter from any card you control or sacrifice ~. [Flavor text: "Mooo." in about 96-point bold.] Incoming! Sorcery 4GGGG Rare Each player searches his or her library for any number of artifacts, creatures, enchantments, and lands and puts those cards into play. Each player shuffles his or her library afterwards. Mine, Mine, Mine! Enchantment 4GG Rare When ~ comes into play, each player puts his or her library into his or her hand. / Each player skips his or her discard phase and does not lose as a result of being unable to draw a card. / Each player cannot play more than one spell each turn. / If ~ leaves play, each player shuffles his or her hand and graveyard into his or her library. Squirrel Farm Enchantment 2G Rare 1G: Choose a card in your hand. Covering the artist's name, reveal the card to target player. If that player cannot name the artist, reveal the artist's name and put a Squirrel token into play. Treat this token as a 1/1 green creature. Team Spirit Instant 2G Common All creatures controlled by target player and his or her teammates get +1/+1 until end of turn. Timmy, Power Gamer Summon Legend 2GG Rare 1/1 4: Put a creature into play from your hand. Burning Cinder Fury of Crimson Chaos Fire Enchantment 3R Rare Whenever any player taps a card, that player gives control of that card to an opponent at end of turn. / If a player does not tap any nonland cards during his or her turn, ~ deals 3 damage to that player at end of turn. [Card is printed sideways.] Chicken Egg Summon Egg 1R Common 0/1 During your upkeep, roll a six-sided die. On a 6, sacrifice ~ and put a Giant Chicken token into play. Treat this token as a 4/4 red creature that counts as a Chicken. Double Deal Sorcery 4R Common Choose another player. ~ deals 3 damage to that player now and deals an additional 3 damage to the player at the beginning of the next game with that player. Goblin Bookie Summon Goblin R Common 1/1 R,Tap: Reflip any coin or reroll any die. Goblin Bowling Team Summon Goblins 3R Common 1/1 Whenever ~ damages any creature or player, roll a six-sided die. ~ deals to that creature or player additional damage equal to the die roll. Goblin Tutor Instant R Uncommon Roll a six-sided die for ~. On a 1, ~ has no effect. Otherwise, search your library for the indicated card, reveal that card to all players, and put it into your hand. Shuffle your library afterwards. 2 -- Any ~. 3 -- Any enchantment. 4 -- Any artifact. 5 -- Any creature. 6 -- Any sorcery, instant, or interrupt. Hurloon Wrangler Summon Minotaur 2R Common 2/2 Denimwalk (If defending player is wearing any clothing made of denim, this creature is unblockable.) Jalum Grifter Summon Legend 3RR Rare 3/5 1R,Tap: Put ~ and two lands you control face down in front of target opponent after revealing each card to him or her. Then, rearrange the order of the three cards as often as you wish, keeping them on the table at all times. That opponent then chooses one of those cards. If a land is chosen, destroy target card in play. Otherwise, sacrifice ~. Krazy Kow Summon Cow 3R Common 3/3 During your upkeep, roll a six-sided die. On a 1, sacrifice ~ and it deals 3 damage to each creature and player. Landfill Sorcery 4R Rare Choose a land type. Remove from play all lands of that type you control. Drop those cards, one at a time, onto the playing area from a height of at least one foot. Destroy each card in play that is completely covered by those cards. Then return to play, tapped, all lands dropped in this way. Ricochet Enchantment R Uncommon Whenever any spell targets a single player, each player rolls a six-sided die. That spell is redirected to the player or players with the lowest die roll. If two or more players tie for the lowest die roll, they reroll until there is no tie. Spark Fiend Summon Beast 4R Rare 5/6 When ~ comes into play, roll two six-sided dice. On a total of 2, 3, or 12, sacrifice ~. On a total of 7 or 11, do not roll dice for ~ during any of your following upkeep phases. If you roll any other total, note it. / During your upkeep, roll two six-sided dice. On a total of 7, sacrifice ~. If you roll the noted total, do not roll dice for ~ during any of your following upkeep phases. On any other roll, there is no effect. Strategy, Schmategy Sorcery 1R Rare Roll a six-sided die for ~. On a 1, ~ has no effect. Otherwise, it has one of the following effects: 2 -- Destroy all artifacts. 3 -- Destroy all lands. 4 -- ~ deals 3 damage to each creature and player. 5 -- Each player discards his or her hand and draws seven cards. 6 -- Roll the die two more times. The Ultimate Nightmare of Wizards of the Coast^R Customer Service Sorcery XYZRR Uncommon ~ deals X damage to each of Y target creatures and Z target players. Charm School Enchant Player 2W Uncommon When ~ comes into play, choose a color and balance ~ on your head. / Prevent all damage to you of the chosen color. / If ~ falls off your head, sacrifice ~. Double Dip Instant 4W Common Choose another player. Gain 5 life now and an additional 5 life at the beginning of the next game with that player. Get a Life Instant W Uncommon Target player and each of his or her teammates exchange life totals. I'm Rubber, You're Glue Enchantment WW Rare Speak only in rhyming sentences. If you do not, sacrifice ~. / Say "I'm rubber, you're glue. Everything bounces off me and sticks to you": Target spell or ability, which targets only you, targets another player of your choice instead. (The new target must be legal.) Knight of the Hokey Pokey Summon Knight WW Common 2/2 First strike 1W,Do the Hokey Pokey (Stand up, wiggle your butt, raise your hands above your head, and shake them wildly as you rotate 360 degrees): Prevent all damage to ~ from any one source. Lexivore Summon Beast 3W Uncommon 2/3 If ~ damages any player, destroy target card in play, other than ~, with the most lines of text in its text box. (If more than one card has the most lines of text, you choose which of those cards to destroy.) Look at Me, I'm the DCI Sorcery 5WW Rare Ban one card, other than a basic land, for the remainder of the match. (For the remainder of the match, each player removes from the game all copies of that card in play or in any graveyard, hand, library, or sideboard.) Mesa Chicken Summon Chicken WW Common 2/2 Stand up,Flap your arms,Cluck like a chicken: ~ gains flying until end of turn. Miss Demeanor Summon Lady of Proper Etiquette 3W Uncommon 3/1 Flying, first strike During each other player's turn, compliment that player on his or her game play or sacrifice ~. Once More With Feeling Sorcery WWWW Rare Remove ~ from the game as well as all cards in play and all graveyards. Each player shuffles his or her hand into her or his library, then draws seven cards. Each player's life total is set to 10. ["DCI Ruling: This card is restricted. (You cannot play with more than one in a deck.)"] Prismatic Wardrobe Sorcery W Common Destroy target card that does not share a color with clothing worn by its controller. You cannot choose an artifact or a land card. Sex Appeal Instant W Common Prevent up to 3 damage total to any number of creatures and/or players. If there are more players on the room of the opposite sex, prevent up to 3 additional damage total to any number of creatures and/or players. The Cheese Stands Alone Enchantment 4WW Rare If you control no cards in play other than ~ and have no cards in your hand, you win the game. Goblin/Kobold Red Pegasus White Knight/Soldier White Zombie/Dead Black Sheep Green Squirrel Green [These are all "token cards".] Forest Island Plains Mountain Swamp --- Wizards of the Coast owns the copyright and trademarks to Magic, and nothing in here should be construed as challenging that; all card texts included here are copyright WotC, and several of the gaming terms are its trademarks. They have given permission to use the exact texts for nonprofit, non-commercial uses; you may not sell this list for profit or use it for non-educational purposes.